Online sexpert

My motto - for teens and pensioners alike - is to 'make friends before you make love'."PS: With a new partner, don't forget the important question of protection.The sex and relationship expert said: "Older people, like all people, should enjoy the sex they want, when they want, how they want and with exactly the energy they want."Laid back is fine if it means being relaxed around sexuality, but passionate and proactive is wonderful too.Many older people find a new lease of life sexually once that they are freed of the worries of pregnancy and child rearing and have time to devote to themselves.

Susan explained: "Often a woman's ability to lubricate drops naturally at the menopause, particularly if she is not using hormonal supplements."If she is feeling dry, then lube is a wonderful idea.

Susan said: "Older people are often nervous of having sex with a new partner - sometimes because they have been in one relationship for a long while and feel they have become limited in what they do."What's often forgotten is that while swinging from the chandeliers is wonderful, what most of us - old or young - are looking for in sex is a sense of connection with another person.

I always advise building that connection before getting into bed, so you not only feel relaxed and safe but can also talk through your expectations and concerns.

It also means that neither of you is taking the weight of the other, unlike the missionary where she's underneath, or 'woman on top' where he is."Also it's a gentle position, that doesn't take much exertion or acrobatics,- and being face-to-face makes it very intimate.

The alternative side-by-side position is 'spooning', where she lies in front, he lies behind her and curled round, penetrating; this may not be as romantic but does mean that either of you can reach down and stimulate her clitoris."Should those over 60 take it easy with a laid-back attitude, when it comes to sex?

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When it's good, it only accounts for around a quarter of your enjoyment of the whole relationship.

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